Why should you want to be left alone? I’m glad you asked.
WHY do you want to be alone?
I don’t care how extroverted or introverted you are, we all need to be alone. It isn’t an if, or an and, or a but.
Keep in mind that I’m a man writing for men, because that’s the only perspective I have.
MEN ABSOLUTELY NEED TO BE ALONE.
Make no mistake about it.
If you’re not learning every day, you’re not much of a man. No matter how small of a thing you learn, you must learn every day.
YOU CAN’T LEARN IF YOU CAN’T REFLECT.
YOU CAN’T REFLECT IF YOU ARE NEVER ALONE.
We could make this really complicated, but we won’t. You need some time by yourself if you’re going to reflect on your experiences.
How Should You Spend Your Time Alone?
You can spend it however you like, as long as you’re in solitude.
I do lots of things alone, even though I’m married. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you have to spend every waking moment with your woman.
Things I do alone:
- Hunt wild game
- Practice active meditation
- Lift Weights (Private Gym)
- Listen to binaural beats
- Take a prolonged bath in Epsom salts
- Reading and taking notes on what I read
- Amateur woodworking
- Play a musical instrument
- Count my money
- Write for you
This is just a short list of things I do while alone. While doing every one of these things, I’m either filling my mind or emptying it.
You can do whatever you like to do. That’s part of the point.
You’re alone. No one is going to say, “Hey, don’t do that.”
No distractions, just you and your thoughts.
There’s just one problem…
Almost 100% of the time that you try to engage in one of these solitary activities, someone is going to bother you.
This is easy enough to stop if it’s over the phone, but if it’s someone physically present in your space when you’re trying to be alone, things can become very annoying very quickly.
That’s what this post is for.
I’ve found three things that help more than you’d believe when it comes to getting someone to leave you alone. The bonus? They’re usually not offended by these methods.
That means you can feel free to use them whenever and on whoever you please. Some people aren’t satisfied with themselves to the point of not caring what others think, and if that’s you then here’s your medicine.
The First Method – Talk About Fatherhood Without Remorse
Nobody wants to hear about how good your kids are or how good of a Dad you are. This one doesn’t need much explanation.
Your kids are a reflection of yourself as a father, and so are everyone else. People like to think that all children are little bastards like theirs are.
Remind them they’re wrong.
If your kids aren’t grossly overweight, talk about how glad you are that they’re active and healthy.
If your kids aren’t a slave to electronics, talk about the impact that’s had on their mental health and physique.
Couch potato Dad with his couch potato kids don’t really like being reminded of this. They’re not even going to argue with you.
They’ll probably just post a passive aggressive Facebook status about it. That’s what feminized men do.
They’ll also leave you the hell alone.
The Second Method – Talk About God With No Remorse
The beauty of this method is that it works on everyone. Nobody wants to talk about God with you except for a minister or a missionary.
It doesn’t even matter if they agree with you or not.
If they disagree with you on God or religion, great. People avoid confrontation like the plague, and will leave you to yourself quickly.
If they agree with you on God or religion, even better. Whatever dirty little thoughts they have were just spotlighted in their mind.
If they’re an atheist, better still. They’ll rattle off some witty remark they read on Twitter and tromp off with their superiority complex supposedly validated.
No matter what the other person thinks or feels, you achieve the mission of keeping your solitude intact.
If this method doesn’t work, try the Fatherhood bit.
If neither of these work, try the third method. I have yet to see the third method fail.
The Third Method – Gift Them Something Excessive Without Remorse
Hands down the best, most effective method of getting someone to go away.
When you give someone a gift (something they recognize whether they appreciate it or not) they can’t stick around without feeling “put on the spot” and awkward.
They feel like they should have something of equal value to give to you. Lacking that, things get awkward and they are compelled to leave.
There are a couple of qualifications to this:
- The gift must be excessive. The more lavish and over the top, the better.
- The gift must be given without remorse. You must keep a straight face and not flinch at parting with whatever you give.
- The gift must be given in such a way that it feels personal. Giving things away willy nilly just makes you seem eccentric and possibly interesting. It must feel like you put serious thought into this.
- The previous qualification is overridden if the gift is in cash money. Cash money has its own psychological power that removes the need for a personal touch.
Wait, you’re suggesting I give away my stuff?
Yes, yes I am.
How much is solitude worth for you? For me, it’s worth a lot. The less time you have, the more it’s worth.
Silence is golden, friend.
If your solitude isn’t worth that much to you and the first two methods don’t work, you’re just going to have to suffer their presence. I don’t have anything else for you.
What’s more, there’s another benefit to giving someone something excessive.
Test Of Character
Usually, when you go somewhere to be alone and someone physically interrupts you with their presence that person is a part of your life.
Joe Blow off the street isn’t going to be inside your home.
Good news for you, giving someone something excessive without remorse is a great test of character. You’re about to learn something very important about that person.
They don’t have to pay you back. You made that abundantly clear.
With most people, you’ll never see them or hear from them again. At least, they’ll wait an “acceptable” amount of time before making contact with you again.
They’ll most certainly dance around the topic of your generous gift and they’ll be praying you’ve forgotten about it. They surely won’t have, even if you have.
If that doesn’t happen, though, you’ve found a person worth keeping around.
Their loyalty to you exceeds their own personal circumstances and their greed. People don’t repay gestures like this very often.
It’s actually a very good test to give someone you’re thinking of doing business with later.
Have you ever used one of these methods?
Leave a comment telling me how it worked for you.